I suck...and NOT in that way

I just read The Dad's blog and I suck. I TOTALLY forgot him when ordering pizza tonight. I feel so bad. I guess he could have ordered it himself though right?

I think I finally slept last night, at least I was able to wake up this morning and not immediately need a nap. Maybe I actually NEED to drink 2 Diet Cokes right before bed? The Baby was up before 10 again. I got him back to sleep just in time for Princess Spazzy to wake up and demand her pancakes. So we all trotted off to the kitchen and made oatmeal (The Baby), pancakes (Princess Spazzy) and waffles (me) and then we did something we have never done before. We ate breakfast at the table. HOLY SHIT....I think I just heard the princess pee on the bathroom floor. She just came up here (she was in the basement with her brother) in a snow suit asking if she could pee. I told her to get it off and get in the bathroom. At least she made it to the bathroom, right. Oh yeah, I just asked her..."There is a tow-yul its ok" UGH...Where was I . Oh we ate breakfast at the table today. I think we should pr'y do that everyday. I went through a bag of garbage, from when Number One cleaned out the van, looking for my license, while Princess Spazzy took 400 years to eat her cancakes. I didn't find my license. I think I am going to have to cave and go get a new one. BARF After breakfast we came back to the bedroom and played, watched a little TV and took some pictures, some of us took more than others. :-)

The Dad came home from work early today. I had big plans....we would leave as soon as he got home and go shopping without the other kids. It would be great. It would be peaceful. It...wasn't gonna happen. The Dad had stopped at Walmart and got a chicken and some chips and brought it all in the bedroom for us to eat. I guess he didn't get the memo that we weren't eating in bed anymore. Princess Spazzy ate her weight in chips and The Baby and I had some chicken. Then Princess and I decided to get the mail. She beat me back to the house and started ringing the doorbell like a madwoman. The Dad came to the door to see what was up. He left The Baby on the bed. I nearly had a heart attack when I saw him at the door sans baby. He ran back to the bed and I heard him say "oh no, you can't do that" or something like that. The Baby had rolled his little buns over to the BAG OF CHIPS and had two fistfuls of them. Thank God he hasn't really figured out how to get things out of his little fists. We sat on the bed debating whether I should take The Princess and The Baby shopping or if we should wait until the boys got home and everyone could go shopping. Princess Spazzy was watching her new favorite show "Maggie and the Rowshus Beef" (Maggie and the Ferocious Beast) I think The Dad must have asked her the name of the show 15 times. We are such mean parents. I decided to go shopping with Princess Spazzy, The Dad decided I had to take The Baby with me. I swear that someday I will escape the house without him.

We all got into the van and I decided I needed to potty before we left. The Dad stayed in the van to keep the kiddos company. When I came out he had backed it halfway out of the garage so he could turn it on and get it warm without asphyxiating everyone inside. He hopped out, I hopped in and we were on our way. "Daddy moved the ban so you wouldn't run over stuff....this is grandma's ban and we can't crash it" UM WHAT? I explained that it was our van, that it had gotten fixed. "oh they painted it and it is new, so now you can't crash anymore reindeers, OK?" GEEZ you hit one little deer and they never let you live it down. I guess I need to tell her about all the Bambis others in the family have slaughtered so she'll get off my back. I called The Dad to tell him what was said and he swore he didn't tell her that. I believe him. She's just a shit. Princess Spazzy decided we should do our shopping in Peoria today. I should have ignored her. I don't think she knows the difference and I was unable to find what I wanted. However we were able to find an Easter Dress that we didn't need and we did get to stop by Sister #1/Sister#2's house and see the babies...and Sister #2. Princess Spazzy even got to hold little E. She was pretty excited. I was holding little A and The Baby at the same time. THAT was a trip. The Baby REALLY likes his cousins. I think he wants to eat them. Although today we decided he was trying to kiss him, it just looked like he was trying to eat his arm. Seriously though I think it was a kiss. Then he tried to rip off his ear. OOPS

We made it home from our shopping trip and Princess Spazzy tried on her Easter Dress for The Dad. She looks so freaking cute. I am gonna have to hide the dress. She is gonna want to wear it everyday. We also bought a present for the neighbor so I packaged that up and The Dad and Princess Spazzy went over to deliver it but no one came to the door. I decided to do what every good neighbor does....emailed them to see if they were home. Then I dumped The Baby on Number One and Princess Spazzy and I walked over.

When I got back I ordered the pizza but not before I got a really strange phone call. I was talking to my mom when I got the call. I saw that it was a local number and figured it was safe to answer. It was Neighbor Jake's dad. He said that he had talked to his wife and it was OK for Jake to stay here but he needed to come home and take a shower first. Um...OK. I hung up and called Joe in. He said that while I was gone Jake had called and asked his dad if he could stay here and play, NOT stay all night, but just stay a little longer. I guess somehow wires got crossed or whatever. At any rate, we have an extra kid tonight. Oh well THAT is what the basement is for right? I think they are still awake down there playing PS2. I wonder if he will ever get to stay here again. LOL At least I fed him some pizza right?

It was kinda nice tonight with the big boys in the basement. The Dad, Princess Spazzy, The Baby and I all watched Gone Country and we got some cute videos of The Baby giggling and crawling (if you can call it that) for the remote. We are sooo in trouble. Everyone (upstairs anyway) is finally asleep. I feel like I might even be soon. WOOHOO

one of the giggle videos





Spazzy's picture of the day (I think she is into self portrait stuff)

I feel witty...

actually I don't. I have no idea what to write about tonight. We had a boring day, seriously boring. I think the highlight was riding to IGA with The Dad.

I didn't get to sleep until after 4:30am and I did find my Zoloft. I guess that wasn't the problem. I just swallowed the last of my 2nd Diet Coke since 6pm and it dawned on me, maybe I need to stop drinking Diet Coke at night. DUH. I am sooo freaking tired. The Baby won't sleep and he won't nurse. Instead he wants to chew off my nipple. Now he is trying to get the mouse. AGH!!!! Anyway...nothing really happened today. I woke up once to hear The Whiner running outside to ask Number One if he could use the spray again. THANK YOU GOD for waking me up. I promptly started yelling "NO NO NO" He asked why and I told him he smelled fine without it. He got to the bus fine and I went back to sleep, I think. The baby was up at about 9:30am. I think he is trying to kill me. He wouldn't go back to sleep. I finally caved and got his oatmeal at 10. I fed him and go him to sleep just in time for Princess Spazzy to wake up demanding...pancakes. Thank GOD we made 36 yesterday. I think we have enough to make it through tomorrow and then we will be at grandma's and SHE can worry about the stupid pancakes. This child is obsessed with them. I have heard her dreaming about them. I woke up one morning to "pancakes pancakes pancakes" and she was SOUND asleep. CRAZY. So anyway, today we skipped the syrup to avoid another sticky pillow night. The rest of the afternoon is foggy. I know I finally got The Baby down for a nap and fell asleep myself and then woke up to giggling. Princess Spazzy had woke up The Baby (I guess that is her royal duty or something). I yelled at her and she promptly went to sleep. I can't say the same for the baby. He wanted to play. I did not. I feel so bad.

As soon as The Whiner came in the door I passed The Baby off to him. "Just play with him, don't let him eat any Legos, tell Number One he has to take care of him, when he gets home I have to sleep." He did exactly as I asked. Bless that boy. Number One came home and took over babysitting but came in to ask me stuff a million times. I think I might have slept a little. When I finally got up I found The Whiner with a huge bowl of oatmeal. I guess he made 4 packets, oink oink. Oh well as long as he ate it all. Then Number One said " The Baby got a piece of The Whiner's mac and cheese and he liked it so I had to make a bowl and share it with him" HELLO!!!!! I said "he can't have mac and cheese yet" to which Number One said "well he only had like 2 pieces" SURE HE DID!!!! Now I am on rash watch. I almost told him that if he acted hungry he could give him some applesauce or any of the other stuff I have prepared for him in the freezer. I really should have. I guess he also fed him graham cracker sticks (which I have let him have before). No wonder I didn't hear him crying, he was eating for an hour.

I had promised the princess that if she took a nap we would make cookies when we woke up. So we made cookies. The Dad came home in the middle of cookie making and at a bunch. We pretty much had cookies for dinner. BAD MOM ALERT!!!!! I had a pan of lasagna out to have for dinner but it was already 6pm and it was going to take 2 hours to cook. Princess Spazzy and I had just eaten the rest of Tuesday's leftovers and then a ton of cookies so we weren't hungry. The Whiner and Number One had eaten everything in the house when they got home from school, so The Dad made popcorn for himself. WOOHOO NO COOKING FOR ME!

I decided to take a shower and had a brilliant idea about a Mother's Day present. While I was in the shower The Dad decided to give Princess Spazzy some boobs. They knocked on the door and I looked out and I see the princess with two balls in her shirt, and she was missing a button so she had cleavage. It was pretty cute but they interrupted my thinking time. And NO he didn't get any pictures. We may have to recreate it sometimes. I got out and we went to IGA (the highlight of the day and we didn't even go in). The Baby cried all the way there and back but was quiet while The Dad was in the store. He is so strange. When we got back The Dad made his own blog. It is good, however I think mine is better, LOL. We watched Idol. I cried. Blah blah blah yadda yadda yadda. I think I am depressed. It kinda sucks. Anyway...that is all I have for tonight. See I told ya I am boring.

My pics of the day...Jenna's is a video because she messed up the camera settings, lol.




















PS... Colin Ferrel is on the Tonight Show. I think my day just got a lot better. I might even have to wake up The Dad. wink wink

Let them eat cancakes!

That isn't a typo, that is what Princess Spazzy calls them.

Melny requested pictures. I think I will do a pic of the day courtesy of Princess Spazzy, who is always stealing my camera, and maybe one of my own.

On to my day. I went to sleep around 2:30am. I couldn't find my Zoloft and therefore couldn't sleep, so today was a tired day. I was barely conscious when The Whiner left for the bus stop. However, I was awake enough to notice that he smelled...like a teenage boy looking for some action. When I asked him about it he explained that Number One gave him deodorant AND body spray that matched because he didn't like it anymore. I guess The Whiner thought he needed to use ALL OF IT today. I was so embarrassed to let him go to school that way but it was too late to have him shower. He said his friends said he smelled good. I guess I should be happy to have one kid that wants to be clean and smell good.

The Baby woke up at 10am. I was not ready to wake up. Unfortunately Princess Spazzy also woke up around that time as well and they heard each other. UGH!!!! The Baby appeared to be in a good mood so I decided that today I could make the dreaded pancakes. Princess Spazzy was up my butt the whole time I was making them, she even called me the "mad wady" again because I said "bad words" about her stool. I made Andes Mint Chip pancakes. They were quite tasty. I did a half batch of Bisquick, it made 36 silver dollar sized pancakes. The princess was amazed that I made them the right size this time. The Baby just wanted me to hurry the heck up. As I was mixing the batter I thought I saw "something". I swear my mom has made me nuts regarding this stuff. I am ALWAYS looking for bugs in stuff. It is sick. I wish I could stop. So anyway the pancakes got done, The Baby's oatmeal was done (and cold but he doesn't care), the princess had a sippy cup of juice and her little cup of syrup...all was well...until her hair got in her face. Princess Spazzy is a bit of a...well...she's blond. She pushed her hair out of her face with the hand she had her plate of pancakes in and her pancakes were not gravity defying (like The Baby's oatmeal) so on the floor they went. Luckily we had about 30 more. We made it to the bed and commenced noshing. I was feeding The Baby his oatmeal when the princess stood up. I noticed something on her ass...was it syrup? OF COURSE IT WAS!!!!! She changed her clothes as I discovered a pool of syrup on the pillow, comforter and The Dad's spot on the sheet(he gets to sleep in the wet, sticky spot tonight). I tried to clean it up with baby wipes, that made it really wet and a little less sticky, at least it smells good though. I don't remember much else happening the rest of the day. I desperately needed a nap but it didn't happen. I think I got 5000 text messages though.

The Whiner came home from school just as I thought Princess Spazzy was going to fall asleep. The two of them disappeared downstairs. When Number One got home I called them all into my room. I guess The Whiner and Princess Spazzy were trying to nap in the basement. Ah...but not before The Whiner doused himself in what The Dad and his brother have coined "comefuckme" also known as cologne. I got an instant headache. I sent The Whiner to the shower and texted The Dad that he had covered himself in the aforementioned substance. He thought it was pretty funny. He didn't have to smell it though. It isn't that it smells bad, it is just that he uses sooooo much. So then Number One came in. I asked him to empty the dishwasher and if he had homework. Then I tried to get him to admit to bad stuff like he did yesterday. It did not work today. Oh well I had to try, right? I then decided that I needed to take a short nap to try to sleep off the headache. Number One took The Baby for me and closed my door. HEAVEN. My half hour nap that started at 3:45pm ended at 5:45pm. I guess The Dad got home about 1/2 hour into my nap. God bless him for letting me sleep. Of course I might have killed him for waking me up. He even made dinner. Sometimes I love that man.

I don't think much else happened the rest of the night. I played with The Baby in the playroom for a bit. Tried to get him to crawl for toys. He can move a bit, but gets pretty pissed off rather quickly. I think he gets that from The Dad. At one point I had my boob out for him to crawl to. That really made him mad. I'm a mean mommy. It is now almost 10:30pm. Princess Spazzy is still awake, in fact she just woke up The Baby. I thanked her and told her she would have to nurse him back to sleep. She cried and said her boobs are too teeny. The Dad and I laughed...a lot.

Here is Princess Spazzy's pic o' the day(she picked this one "do the one up my nose mama")

If you are reading this...I'm sorry

Sorry because I am V E R Y boring. I'm not even sure why I decided to do a blog, I guess because my sister has one. So I think my uber boring blog will just be about what happened in my day. Prepare to be dazzled...

Today started out rather uneventful. Princess Spazzy slept until 11am or so. The Baby was up before that but was content just to suck the life out of me until he heard his sister. We got out of bed. Made some breakfast. Ate it in bed. That's what we do...everyday is breakfast in bed day, and up until last week it was lunch in bed day too. Princess Spazzy wanted pancakes, of course, and we didn't have any. However, The Dad had bought pancake mix for me and I decided I would make some super special mint chocolate chip pancakes. That is until I realized that The Dad didn't buy complete pancake mix and I would have to make a regular batch of pancakes. Sure one "batch" only makes 7-8 regular pancakes....but the princess can only eat mini pancakes and one batch makes, I don't know, 7 million or so. The Baby was clearly NOT going to allow me to make that many. So....I found some waffles in the freezer. Popped two in the toaster, cut one into strips and served the princess. "Mama what is this thing?" "It is a waffle" "MMM this is good, but why did you says its a waffle, its not a waffle mama, its a pancake" I guess I am stupid. I had a brilliant idea while I was nuking The Baby's oatmeal. I should cook the chicken for dinner RIGHT NOW. So I did. It was brilliant. And then at lunch, I cooked the stuffing. I need to prep cook like that everyday. Dinner went super smooth tonight and I think it is because I already had a lot of stuff done. So the rest of the afternoon was boring. Princess Spazzy and The Baby pretended to nap while watching Miss Spider and I chatted with Sister #1 on Gmail. Then the boys came home.

The Whiner came in all teary looking and said his stomach hurt. It was hurting around his surgery scar. I started to panic. Sister #1 offered to come here so I could take him to the Dr. but I decided to wait. We later decided he had injured himself while roller skating on Sunday. I thought I had heard he and Number One fighting yesterday but I guess it was a dream. The Whiner got in the shower because he was sure that would make his stomach feel better (he has a thing for showers) and while he was in there Number One came home. I called him into my room. "Number One, I need to ask you something, you need to tell me the truth, I won't be mad" Now, mind you, I was going to ask him if he punched The Whiner in the nuts. Before I said anything else Number One said "Yes it is true" He can read my mind? I asked him what I was talking about. "the detention?" Guilt, it is a wonderful thing. The Dad says we are just going to randomly start saying that to them to see what they confess to. So it turns out that Number One isn't doing his homework. SURPRISE SURPRISE Of course it is hard to do it when he never has any. He got zeroes 5 & 6 sometime last week. This kid is toast next year. He only has one homework nazi this year, they aren't nice in junior high. So.....he will be serving an internal school suspension (3rd one this school year) sometime this week or next. He must like them. I am horrified.

Number One disappeared and Princess Spazzy and the Whiner were laying on the register covered up with a blanket. I hear the princess say "uncle Lloyd gave me this blanket" (uncle Lloyd died of cancer before she was even conceived) I said "no he didn't and you don't even know who that is" to which The Whiner replied " I know who it is and I made him die" After I picked up and reattached my jaw I asked him what he meant. Apparently he has it in his head that he caused my uncle to die because he made him carry him around all the time. He was barely 3 when he died, how does he even remember this stuff? So I told him it wasn't his fault and tried to get the story of why he thinks that. It is long...boring and frankly it is pissing me off so much I shouldn't blog about it...so anyway

Dinner was rather uneventful, we actually ate BEFORE 7 tonight, The Baby ate at like 5:30 and even had a bath before we ate. I was able to make two trays of baby food for him, including a very visually appealing mixture of carrots, green beans and chicken. The Dad and I wanted Princess Spazzy to taste it. I told her I would first. I did, wish I wouldn't have. It didn't taste bad, but the texture was EWWWWWW. Princess Spazzy never did taste it, but The Baby LOVED it. We watched Idol and then...drum roll please....I took a shower...in the bathroom...alone. WOOHOO GO ME!!!!!

Man this is long.....sorry!